We do not have cable, so we have to wait until the good shows put their last season on Netflix before we can catch up. Don’t tell me how Breaking Bad ended Sunday night. Wait – I mean, don’t tell Josh. He’s the one who watches it, and I just ask him to tell me about it, and then I watch it, once I know what’s going to happen. Because I can’t handle it. I know that takes all the fun out of it, but I’m not good with suspense. I can’t sit still while watching intense shows – I pace and talk back to the TV, continuously predicting the worst, as if to prepare myself for it. Annoying, I know. This makes picking a series to watch together very difficult. Hence all the National Geographic documentaries about icebergs in our queue. However, I guess I recently told Josh I could handle The Walking Dead because I don’t believe in zombies. I know they’re not real, so I’m not scared of them. At least, that was my logic whenever I said it…before I started watching The Walking Dead. But now that we have started watching the series…I’m scared of zombies. And vampires (even though they’re not a part of the series). And any other category of scary that falls under “the undead.” I’m not looking forward to Halloween in a few weeks.
So what does this have to do with being a new mama? Two things:
First, I learned the hard way that I should not hold Dylan while I pace back and forth and watch people narrowly escape death from slack-jawed walkers. At one point in last night’s viewing, I jumped, screamed, and clutched Dylan tightly all at the same time, waking him from a slumber I hadn’t realized he’d attained. Whoops.
And second: Now that I’m a mam, I’m terrified of any sort of post-apocalyptic universe where we’re trolling through vacant towns, running for our lives, and living off of squirrel. I couldn’t hack it. I’ve always thought: if human civilization crumbles, I hope I go down with the masses; none of this Cormac McCarthy living on The Road nonsense for me. But now that we’ve got Dylan, I can’t bear the thought of not striving to live; he’s too full of life to not be hopeful. Sadly, this leaves me only one option: I’d better sit my butt down and start taking notes when we watch these shows, so I’ll be more equipped to survive the end, if and when it comes.
I used to think these creatures were cute…now, not so much…